(I’m going to start off by saying that I’m writing this ONLY because both kids are miraculously napping at the same time)
It is what you make of it. Quite true for the most part for everything in life; however, I don’t possess the superpowers to make PCSing continuously easy and enjoyable.
As of today, it has officially been 3 weeks. The first 2 weeks were exciting as I was meeting new people, joining groups/clubs, and staying busy with the kids. The third week is when it started to wear on me because I feel like ALL I do 24/7 is wipe butts, wash dishes, pick up toys, do the laundry, put away the laundry, give baths, make breakfast, make lunch, make dinner, make it to music class, make it to story time, attempt the grocery store only to turn around on the way because one of the kids falls asleep then to wake up once were home again. Phew!
I know a lot of people run a household and raise kids single handedly and survive, but I have always been surrounded by my family for help. I’m not used to not being able to reach out for help when I need it. When I feel like I can’t pick up one more mess off the ground, the sound of whining in my ears is almost white noise. I space off and think about nothing. Seriously, my mind goes blank. I want nothing in my head, I want to “veg” out and think of doing nothing. At this point I knew I needed to change something. I needed to be proactive again in bringing the light back to our little family.
Isn’t it true when they say it takes a village to raise a child? Yes! It has been 3 weeks and I am WORN OUT. I need a break for my sanity and that is the truth.
How can you be the best version of yourself if you continue to take yourself to the breaking point? You can’t. PCSing is hard. Moving is hard. Raising kids along with it is even harder. Try not to make it more difficult on yourself by thinking you can do everything alone; you can’t. It’s not a bad thing at all. You are human. This PCS that took me away from my support system may be a blessing in disguise. I am forced to make decisions for myself and my kids so that I can be a better mother to my children and also a better wife to my husband.
Whether it’s leaving your kid at preschool for the first time, or daycare, I know for certain no one wants to leave their children with “complete strangers.” My husband’s job is putting me in the position to leave my children with someone new; something I never thought I would have to do… yet. I can’t do this by myself anymore and it scares me half to death. I always thought I would stay at home with the kids until Peter started preschool when he turned 4. He is not even 3 yet, but because of my circumstances I need this kid in preschool ASAP. At first I felt bad and I held off the idea of leaving my only son with “complete strangers.” No one should feel bad about this or think you are a bad mom or a bad dad. It is healthy for your children, your family, and you.
I always imagined leaving my son with “complete strangers” would be the hardest day of my life. Fortunately, it turned out to be a very pleasant experience- what a huge relief! No, I didn’t know these care takers YET and they are strangers. But as soon as I stepped foot into that daycare/preschool I felt an ease come over me. The women there were so nice and were so interested in Peter. They talked about all the activities they were going to do and all the new friends he would meet and his face lit up like I’ve never seen before!
PCSing is hard. Moving is hard. Raising kids along with it is even harder. Try not to make it more difficult on yourself. There are so many opportunities available that can make the transition easier. All you have to do is trust. I know they are strangers and it’s difficult to trust someone you don’t know, but get to know them! Take baby steps and have them over for lunch just to hang out with the family and when you feel more comfortable, take the next step and leave the kids with them while you run an errand. Take baby steps and listen to your gut.
In honor of Memorial Day, I just want to say thank you to all the moms and dads serving in our military that stay strong for their families during hard times PCSing. Thank you to all the families I have met that while I had/ have a hard time being away from one support system, I now know that I am making a new one.
Thank you Kristina of Anza Foto and Film for capturing these sweet moments with my greatest support system.